Saturday, February 20, 2016

Transylmania (2009)

Directors: David Hillenbrand, Scott Hillenbrand

Stars: Patrick Cavanaugh, James DeBello, Tony Denman

Moronic American student Rusty arranges a student exchange program for his closest friends and him to study in Romania for six months and meet his Internet girlfriend Draguta. He travels with potheads Pete and Wang, Pete's girlfriend Lia and her twin sister Danni, the naive and romantic Newmar and his dippy girlfriend Lynne, the nerd Brady and his sexually confused roommate Mike, and crook Cliff. His friends actually intend to party. While traveling by train to Razvan they learn that five hundred years ago the vampire Radu lost his beloved Stephania, whose spirit was trapped in a music box. Ever since, Radu has kept Stephania's body while seeking the music box to bring her back. One of Radu's minions has recently retrieved the music box but, mortally wounded by the vampire slayer Teodora Van Sloan, drops the object in a gypsy's basket. Newmar unwittingly buys the music box and gives it to Lynne, who opens it and is possessed by Stephania.

That is the entire movie in a nutshell. Adding lots of naked women in the mix. This movie is nothing but a sad wannebe parody of the teen vampire movies. It is one of the worst ones that I have seen. The acting was really bad, as in, it was reaching porno quality. The sets were the best part of the whole movie. Who goes to see a movie based on how good the sets were?

This movie is stupid in a bad way. It really tries to be funny, but it fails every single time. The movie is a mess. It does not even have that it is so bad that it is good vibe to it. I say skip this one completely. Do something else instead.

Transylmania (2009) Trailer

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