Thursday, January 15, 2015

Tammy (2014)

Director: Ben Falcone

Stars: Melissa McCarthy, Susan Sarandon, Kathy Bates, Dan Aykroyd, Gary Cole, Toni Collette, Sandra Oh

Tammy is having the worst day of her life, so far. She hits a deer on her way to work at Topper Jack's, fast food restaurant. Of course, Tammy gets fired for being late again. After walking home, she finds her husband cooking lunch for a female neighbor he has been seeing. She packs a bag and walks down the street to her parents house to stay there. Even after a fight over a car and money, Tammy and her alcoholic grandmother Pearl just take off on a road trip to get away from their lives. While on the trip, Tammy learns real quick that her ailing grandmother needs to be watched and taken care of more than she thought. Tammy ends up making lots of self discoveries along the way.

Most of the big jokes in the movie were shown in the trailer, but there were more than that. Tammy and Pearl in jail. Tammy robbing a fast food restaurant for bail money. The movie is funny, but it is not a movie that you would want to watch over and over. It is worth watching once, though.
Melissa McCarthy is cashing in on her fame, which is what anyone else would do. It is sad that her star will not shine forever. Someone else will come out and be all over the place and in tons of movie. That is how Hollywood works and what the trendy American audience demands.

The cast is great and solid. A well seasoned comedic cast fills the movie. It is really hard to see Susan Sarandon as a grandmother. You just do not think of her at that age, even though she is. It is really weird, but she is pretty funny in the movie.


It is a funny movie to watch with the gang drinking and what not. It is worth watching. Enjoy.










Tammy (2014) Trailer

The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies (2014)

Director: Peter Jackson

Stars: Ian McKellen, Martin Freeman, Richard Armitage, William Kircher, Orlando Bloom, Lee Pace, Cate Blanchett, Hugo Weaving, Christopher Lee, Ian Holm, Stephen Fry, Benedict Cumberbatch

The dragon, Smaug, has fled the Lonely Mountain, and making his way to Lake-town where he shows the people his wrath and power. Gandalf is rescued from the Necromancer's prison and his rescuers realize who the Necromancer is. The dwarves have made it back to the Lonely Mountain only to have to help the other armies defeat the Orcs.

The last chapter of the Hobbit trilogy is filled with action, and I mean filled with it. There is not that much else going on in the movie, except for fighting. The book was not long enough to make three movies out of it, but I understand why they did it. They wanted the same kind of money that The Lord of the Rings movies brought in, but those movies had better scripts than the Hobbit movies. I think people should read the book before and after watching the movies to see what the true story is all about.
The coolest part of this chapter was how they really brought in the material from The Lord of the Ring story line. I think it make the non-reading audience feel a bit more comfortable seeing images from the other movies. They still get to see the eye and familiar characters that lead up to the former movies. It makes they feel safe in a way.
The creation of the Smaug character was still the best part about this movie as well as two previous ones. It looked so real, almost better than it did in the previous movie. Benedict Cumberbatch is the voice for Smaug, but with the digital changes in the speech you would have no idea it was him, until you see his name in the credits. his voice and speech pattern help complete the look and sound of the dragon. The other Orcs that were made for this movie look better than the ones in LOTR. I hate to say it.


There is a lot of stuff going on in this movie that sometimes seems a bit unnecessary. It is a really cool movie to watch, but I am not sure if any of the Hobbit movies are repeat watchers, like the LOTR movie are for me. I think they are still worth owning, but do not pay too much for them. Enjoy.

The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies (2014) Trailer

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008)

Director: Scott Derrickson

Star: Keanu Reeves, Jennifer Connelly, Kathy Bates, Jaden Smith, Jon Hamm, Kyle Chandler, John Cleese

Dr. Helen Benson is taken from her home by the military and loaded in a military truck along with other scientists to help examine an UFO that has landed in New York City. The passenger of the UFO has survived. His name is Klaatu, and he has come here to save the Earth. The military sees him as a threat to the country and to the world. They want to know what he really plans on doing while here on Earth. When Dr. Benton discovers how Klaatu plans on saving the Earth, She tries to convince him to change his mind.

This is another one of those pointless remakes. I mean come on people! If you are going to do a remake, you need to make the remake better than the original one, not worse. They changed the location to New York City, why? Have there not been enough movie made in the past 10 that were not filmed and based in New York City. Come on people, it is a big country with a lot of cities, just pick another one. A huge problem with this movie was the fact that Gort was missing. Oh no, my bad. I blink to many times. He was barely in the movie. Gort was one of the coolest part of the original movie. I mean there was all of the new digital computer work that they could have done with the character, but they just failed Gort.
The worst part of the movie was having an annoying spoiled bratty kid in it. Why, oh why, did they have to do that?   The kid that was in the original wanted nothing more to be friends with Klaatu. It was innocent and make the scenes between the two characters worth watching. They get the annoying, I'm in movies because my parents are famous, Jaden Smith. The director and acting of that kid was terrible. I got so sick of hearing about his father, and how shitty his character was toward Klaatu through most of the movie. I would have killed that character off. He did nothing at all to the movie, except he created more problems are more drama. Can we say pointless?
The good points of the movie was the cast was good at what they were given. They thought it would have been better too. The special effects for the movie looks really cool. Isn't it sad that is all I can say good about it? Once you start watching the movie and getting into it, that kid just stats talking and ruins the whole experience.


If you want to see a good movie then skip this one and go watch the original one. It is so much better. I watched it so you don't have to.











The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) Trailer



Into the Woods (2014)


Director: Rob Marshall

Stars: Anna Kendrick, Meryl Streep, Chris Pine, James Corden, Emily Blunt, Christine Baranski, Tammy Blanchard, Tracey Ullman, Johnny Depp

A Baker and his wife discover that they have had a curse placed on them by the witch that lives next. The witch tells the couple that the child that they desire will never come unless they collect four different items from the woods for her, so she can cast a spell on the night of the blue moon that will make her beautiful again.

This movie combines the classic beloved Grimm fairy tales in a musical format that follows the classic stories of Cinderella, Little Red Riding Hood, Jack and the Beanstalk, and Rapunzel-all tied together by an original story. The baker and his wife have to "collect" an item from each of the stories. This movie is a film version of the stage musical by  Stephen Sondheim, who also worked on the film.

Here is what I liked about the movie. The production was flawless. The look of the movie was completely spot on. You were really taken into this fairy tale land of stories. The sets alone brought the viewer along for the ride. The special effects were realistic and well needed. Costumes for the movie set the period and finalized the creation of the characters. The cast did a great job with their performances, and even with the singing. Can you tell that I'm pushing the positivity the best I can?
The problems with this movie for myself were many. Let me get into it. First of all the cast had way too many big names in it to sell the movie. It is a trick that they do to get non-movie people to fill the theaters when the outcome of the movie maybe questionable. These viewers will only look to see that their favorite actors are in the movie or at least actors that they know about. It was released around the holidays at a time when people and families go to watch movies, and it was a family friendly movie. It was also a Disney movie. All of these components above made this movie a hit. Read other reviews to see what people really thought of the movie or spread this one around. It is nothing but a musical. I mean at least 80% of the movie is singing. I am not a big fan of musicals. I will admit to that, but come on, my friends that like musicals did not like this movie, but they liked the film version of the stage musical. That has got to tell you something.

This movie seemed liked it was just rushed to make at times and the rest of the time the movie dragged on to seem like forever. There was just too much going on in the movie to care about the characters or what was even going on. Each scene only lasted a few minutes before going to another story then another, and then it would go back to the first one, and start all over again. It was just too much jumping around through the movie for me.


I know there will be a lot of people that will not agree with me on this, but I gave this movie a chance. Watch this movie if you must, but don't say that I didn't warn you. I have told friends to skip it.
Into the Woods (2014) Trailer

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Phobia (2013)

Director: Rory Douglas Abel

Stars: Michael Jefferson, Emma Dubery, Sarah Schoofs

After a being involved in a car accident that killed his wife, Jonathan MacKinlay has been afflicted with agoraphobia. The only people that come to visit him are his therapist, Dr. Edmonston, his best friend Taylor, and Bree, the new girl that brings him his groceries. Jonathan is trapped in his house with only these people for interactions. Recently he has been having hallucinations seeing his wife and other dead people walking around in his house. He has been having a problem with what he is seeing is real or just images.

This is another one of those movies that if they had thrown a bit more money of time into it that the movie could have been a bit better. The acting was bad for the most part with some scenes being almost decent. The story was pretty boring with so little explanation that the view can become lost. I do not mean that the plot or any part of the movie was complex by any means, but you just do not care enough to really pay attention to all of the pointless scenes that are being flashed in front of you.


This is a movie to completely skip. The only up side to the movie is that the actors are a bit attractive and there are a few sex scenes. It is a sad part that I even mention that about a movie, but those are the only positive things I can say about the movie. I watched it so you don't have to.



Phobia (2013) Trailer

Thursday, January 8, 2015

Let's Be Cops (2014)

Director: Luke Greenfield

Stars: Jake Johnson, Damon Wayans Jr., Rob Riggle, Andy Garcia, James D'Arcy

Ryan and Justin are roommates in their thirties and their lives are going nowhere. Justin is an underachiever video game editor, and Ryan is a former pro athlete who is retired because of an injury and is now a struggling actor Their college alumni is holding a masquerade party which Ryan thinks more like a costume party. They dress up as cops to attend the party and look like loser fools. While walking around after the party, they both are treated by the public as cops, so Ryan decides that they need to be cops. Ryan goes way too far and starts to buy the gear and practicing being a cop. While they go about acting like cops, they run into real trouble with a mafia guy that wants them taken care of.

This is a slapstick "funny" cop buddy movie, but they are not cops. Both of the characters are total losers that get what they deserve, especially Ryan. I would just punch that loser in the throat every time I could. I did not feel sorry at all for the Justin character. He was the loser that still lived with and hung out with that asshole that only gets him into trouble. That is how nice people go to jail, by hanging out with loser trash assholes. Just think about it.

This most was not funny. They tried so hard to make this movie funny, and you can tell it by watching it. The movie comes off more annoying than anything else. The jokes are bad and predictable. The acting is bad, but they were hoping for something with the Wayans name attached to it. I would say skip this movie and watch something on PBS. I watched it so you don't have to.

Let's Be Cops (2014) Trailer

Leatherface: Texas Chainsaw Massacre III (1990)

Director: Jeff Burr

Stars: Kate Hodge, Ken Foree, R.A. Mihailoff, William Butler, Viggo Mortensen

Michelle and Ryan are driving her father's car from L.A. to Florida. As they are driving through Texas one night, they arrive at a traffic stop. The local sheriff have found a mass burial off the highway. The next day they stop to get gas at a rundown seedy station off the highway, where they meet "Tex", a strange cowboy looking for a ride home. he shows them another route not on the map to make better time. It just takes the couple closer to meet Leatherface and the Family.

Other than the original one, this was an awesome addition to the series. The look of the movie was dark and dirty with a sense of fear around every corner, until you get into the house. The scenes from inside the house are the best. You can just tell that all bets are off and you get prepared for total insanity with all of these characters. Then you have two more characters that are helping Michelle try to escape from the madness that she is going through. You still have some hope that she will make it out alive, but with the family the way that they are you kind of have your doubts.
The "family" in the third installment is the most interesting one by far. Throughout the whole movie these people are show cased in their own way. How do you find that many people to make a family when you are Leatherface? He cannot even speak, but he found others that are into cannibalism. What is wrong with the rest of the world? Look at what he did. They even have a daughter that likes to play with dolls made out of baby skeletons. She will not be able to be placed in a home. People just will not be able to handle her special dolls.

What a good horror cast this movie has. Ken Foree was such a great addition. He has been in so many horror movies that he is now a legend in horror. Everyone knows his name and of course his face. I'm glad that they picked him to be in one of the Chainsaw movies. It is the same for William Butler. He has been a victim for all of them. Just look him up. And before we fell in love with him in The Lord of the Rings movie, Viggo Mortensen was prancing around and trying to kill people in this movie. His character was written originally as transsexual inside the house, but all they did was to have him wear a frilly apron and nail polish. It was the end of the 80's when they made the movie, and God forbid if anything is thought to be gay in any way in a movie. Horror was mostly straight men and heavy metal.


This is a movie for horror fans to cherish and love. It beats the hell out of the one that was made after this one. It is a movie to add to your collection. I can't count the times that I have seen this movie. Enjoy.





Leatherface: Texas Chainsaw Massacre III (1990) Trailer

Jaws: The Revenge (1987)

Director: Joseph Sargent

Actors: Lorraine Gary, Lance Guest, Mario Van Peebles, Karen Young, Michael Caine, Mitchell Anderson, Lynn Whitfield

Ellen Brody is still living on Amity Island with her son Sean whom is now a sheriff's deputy. One night Deputy Brody was checking on a buoy when he was attack by a great white shark. Ellen Brody is devastated, do she moves to the Bahamas to live with her son Michael and his family. She is convinced that a shark is stalking her family, and they will be safe in the warm waters in the Caribbean. Even though the water is too warm for a shark, the shark that killed Sean has come to terrify the rest of the Brody family and anyone else around them.

This final chapter in the series was a stretch, but at least it was released in the cinemas. After the 3-D Jaws, did we really need another movie? This movie at least ended with the same family instead of pick a random person that really has nothing to do with any part of the movies. You know you have seen that crap before. The only main difference is the location. The other changes are that Michael is a marine biologist, and her is married to a different woman, Carla, she is an artist.
 Lorraine Gary comes back to play Ellen Brody. Poor gay Mitchell Anderson is in the beginning of the movie as Sean Brody. He can never get a break. Lynn Whitfield gets a start in the movies. The most shocking cast for the movie was Michael Caine. Who did he piss off to have to do this movie? He is a seasoned actor not worthy of a bad chapter to a horror series.

Look this last chapter in the Jaws series was pretty weak, but I still like it though. Don't ask me why. It is lame as hell with all of the killing scenes and the budding love affair between Ellen Brody and Hoagie. Old love is gross, even when I get there it still will be gross. The worst part of the movie was the whole a killer shark is going to follow you to kill the rest of your family. If that were to happen, there would be no way in hell you would move near the coast. You would move to Oklahoma or somewhere else in the middle of the country, not an island. She was really stupid.


If you skipped this movie then go back and watch it for a laugh, or from boredom. It is worth watching, but it is not a great movie by any means. Enjoy. 








Jaws: The Revenge (1987) Trailer


Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Jaws 3-D (1983)

Director: Joe Alves

Stars: Dennis Quaid, Bess Armstrong, Simon MacCorkindale, Louis Gossett Jr., John Putch, Lea Thompson

The sons of former Amity police chief Martin Brody, Michael Brody and Sean Brody, are all  grown up. Michael runs the maintenance at the Sea World park in Orlando, FL, while his girlfriend, Kathryn works with the sea mammals in the park. They are both waiting on the arrival of Mike's little brother Sean, who is on break from college. Calvin Bouchard runs the entire sea park, which a small film headed by  Philip Fitz Royce is there to film the opening of a new addition to the park. A baby great white shark enters into the lagoon of the park. Kathryn is excited to have the only live great white in captivity, but the baby dies. The mother of the baby enters the park in search of her infant. Now they have to figure out how to kill this massive great white before it kills more people in the park.

This movie came out in the sea of all of the 3-D horror movies of the early 80's. The 3-D effects in the movie were a bit cheesy, but for the day it was more than what people expected. You see fish and eels coming out of the screen with the added body part here and there. The effect worked for the most part. The rest of the special effects were minimal with some bitten and eaten body parts.

The cast was a known and up and coming group of actors. Dennis Quaid was young and handsome then, and Bess Armstrong worked her way to playing a mother a lot. Louis Gossett Jr. just finished A, Officer and a Gentlemen, but in several scenes it seemed like he was playing the same role in both movies. This was Lea Thompson first film, and she starts a great career all through the 80's then she disappears. It happens to the best of them.

I saw this movie as a kid when it aired on the paid cable channels. The movie did not scare me at all. That same summer my family went on vacation to Florida, and where did we go? We went to Sea World where the movie was made. Now the shark tunnel was completely different, but what kid would know that. You are at the entrance of the exhibit and scared that a shark was going to break through. To make the whole experience worse to the right of the entrance was a large glass front freezer with one of the sharks that was used in the swimming scenes. It died so they thought it should be on display. Sickos.

For what it is worth, I really did like the movie, even though there are tons of haters and bad reviews of the movie all over the internet. It is still a piece of 80's horror that needs love and embracing.

Jaws 3-D (1983) Trailer

















Thursday, November 13, 2014

Jaws 2 (1978)

Director: Jeannot Szwarc

Stars: Roy Scheider, Lorraine Gary, Murray Hamilton, Joseph Mascolo

Four years later and the little coastal town of Amity is working on bouncing back from being known as shark city. The mayor is welcoming a developer that is going to build a new beach side resort in the town. Two divers are attack one night by a shark in the same area where Sheriff Brody killed the shark years earlier. Another shark is lose in the waters near Amity Island, and the town is at risk of losing a future resort, so Brody works on finding and killing the shark.

This one was not as scary as the first one, since that scare of the water had already been created. It was still scary to younger kids that did not know any better. The movie is good, but not as good as the first one of course, but it was still worth the watch. They never really explain how this could have to the same area twice. You get a stalking and hunting human eating machine that hits the same area. There are two different great white sharks just like each other. Like the first movie, this one beach areas as well.
The main element that the movie was missing was Steven Spielberg and Richard Dreyfuss. They were still working on Close Encounters of the Third Kind. The director for the sequel was good, but it could have almost been a TV Movie of the Week instead of a major movie production. It was a good movie though. It was a little too much like the first, but what can you really do extra with a horror movie about a shark. They did what they could. Richard Dreyfuss' character was really missed. I would have loved to see him come back and fight a shark one last time. Instead, we get Joseph Mascolo playing the investor for the new resort. You remember him from the daytime soap Days of Our Lives playing Stefano DiMera. The rest of the cast comes back to replay their role which makes for an easier transition to the sequel. Instead of making the sequel in another town that is experiencing the same problem further down the coast. That would have made these movies last forever.


Not a scary movie at all, but it is still a fun movie to watch. It is pretty much safe for most ages to watch. I think it a good enough movie to add to a private collection. Enjoy.







Jaws 2 (1978) Trailer

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

The Apparition (2012)

Director: Todd Lincoln

Stars: Ashley Greene, Sebastian Stan, Tom Felton

When frightening events start to occur in their home, young couple Kelly and Ben discover they are being haunted by a presence that was accidentally conjured during a university parapsychology experiment. The horrifying apparition feeds on their fear and torments them no matter where they try to run. Their last hope is an expert in the supernatural, but even with his help they may already be too late to save themselves from this terrifying force. After witnessing the apparition, the couple go to a hotel, but they're attacked there as well. As they flee, they receive a call from Patrick and meet him. Patrick explains that the initial experiment enabled a malevolent spirit entity to enter their world, but that he has built a room surrounded by a negative current that he believes protects him from the spirit. They return to Kelly and Ben's house to try a new experiment to contain the entity. During the experiment, the house begins to shake and break apart, then abruptly stops. While Kelly and Ben are outside, Patrick is pulled into the darkness and vanishes.

This is the most not scary movie I have ever sat through. I have seen creeper kids movies than this one. It feels like it is trying to be like an actual movie version of a Paranormal Activity movie. What is the deal with these movies that have decent cast with really weak stories? There are just too many of these types of movies being made. I guess they were hoping that having Tom Felton in the movie banking on the Harry Potter crowd would help in launching the movie. It did not help at all. Warner Brothers just sneaked this movie in to select theaters in hopes of a bigger audience, but it still flopped.


Watch this movie if there is nothing else to watch or if you need background noise while you are cleaning the house or working on other projects. This is not a movie to really sit down and pay attention to. It just was not worth that much time spent. 








The Angriest Man in Brooklyn (2014)

Director: Phil Alden Robinson

Stars: Robin Williams, Mila Kunis, Peter Dinklage, James Earl Jones, Richard Kind

Henry Altmann owns a law firm with his brother, Aaron Altmann. Henry is having a really bad day, but for Henry everyday is a really bad day. He is an angry man that hates and complains about almost everything in life. Henry goes to his doctor's appointment, but his normal doctor is out of town, so Dr. Sharon Gill is taken over for the day. Sharon is having a really bad day of her own, since she is covering for the doctor that she is having an affair with. Henry learns from Dr. Gill that he has a brain aneurysm at the base of his brain stem. She gets so angry from Henry yelling at her that she tells him that he only has 90 minutes to life. Henry leaves the clinic to start living what he believes is left of his life. Dr. Gill feels so guilty about blowing up at Henry that she leaves work to go and find him to tell him the truth. Henry works on trying to fix his family's problem in a short amount of time.


The story was pretty interesting, but the movie was just watchable, and that is about it. It had the cast and the movie looked good and it was shot well. The movie just does not leave any type of a lasting emotional feel with you at all. There were a few moments that the movie tried to become more heartfelt, but the rest of the movie almost stopped you from caring about those scenes.

I barely even remember hearing about this movie when it came out. If you do not like to hear a lot of profanity, then you should not watch this movie at all. Enjoy.  






The Angriest Man in Brooklyn (2014) Trailer