Monday, February 23, 2015

The Killer Nun (1979)

Director: Giulio Berruti

Stars: Anita Ekberg, Paola Morra, Alida Valli, Joe Dallesandro

Sister Gertrude is the head nun in a hospital. She has discovered that she has a brain disease, so to be able to handle the pain she starts injecting morphine. While self medicating taking daily shots, her mental and moral capacity starts to slip. The nun starts to go out in the village in normal clothing, drinking and picking up men for sexual flaunts in lobbies. Gertrude begins to cross the ultimate line, and she starts to murder some of the patients in the hospital.

You are entering into the world of Italian horror, my first one to review. If you like you movies without a real reason or a why, then you will like this movie. This movie watches as if you entered into a theater late and leave a little early. The movie watches like it is a section out of a longer movie. That is not necessary a bad thing.

The story is a bit out there, especially for the time period, but all over the world the movie industry was breaking out of all of the barriers that were placed on them. This movie is an example of movie taking you to the forbidden. A drug addicted nun drink and whoring around with strangers starts to murder sick old people in a hospital. Now that is how to do it. Sister Mathieu wants to dive into her crotch so bad that takes orders from her with a smile and a heated loins.

I wish there were some woman on woman crotch grinding. It would have just completed the movie. That whole sad seduction with no chance of getting lesbian sex was a letdown to all of the straight oily geeky guys watching this movie in hopes of horror titty gratification. You get to see some, but not the way you wanted them, sorry guys. It all seemed like a Swedish Exotica soft-core horror movie. No real sex or scares. Speaking of sex and nudity, Joe Dallesandro is in this movie. He was in the Warhol and in Paul Morrissey movies. He keeps his pants on in this movie. Pity.

The main reason that I really like Italian horror movies, is that they always go too far. I like that so much. The death are over the top and at times beautiful. Gertrude completely destroyed a old woman's false teeth in this one. Now only did she step on them, she did not stop until they were in pieces all over the floor. This is an odd movie, but something good to watch. I hope you check this movie out. Enjoy.

The Killer Nun (1979) Trailer
The Killer Nun (1979) Full Movie

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Leprechaun 2 (1994)

Director: Rodman Flender

Stars: Warwick Davis, Charlie Heath, Shevonne Durkin, Sandy Baron, Clint Howard

It is the Leprechaun's 1,000th birthday, he gets to choose his own bride. He picks the daughter of his slave whom messes up the wedding. On his 2,000th birthday, the Leprechaun is back to marry the descendant of his first pick, but the girl, Bridget, has a boyfriend, Cody. He helps his Uncle Morty run a company called Darkside Tours. The Leprechaun wakes up and kill any person that gets in the way. He kidnaps his future bride. Cody heads to the Leprechaun's home to rescue her, but the house has many different surprises for Cody.

The sequel was pretty awkward. They really tried to be all slap-stick and funny in this one, but it all just came off as lame. The make-up was still good. The killings were less impressive, but it gets that way sometimes with a sequel. If there was not bad language or nudity in these movies, then you could almost show them to children. Okay, I know kids should not watch these.

If there is nothing else to watch, then watch a documentary. It would be better than this crap. Watch if you must.

Leprechaun 2 (1994) Trailer

Ouija (2014)

Director: Stiles White

Stars: Olivia Cooke, Ana Coto, Daren Kagasoff, Bianca A. Santos, Douglas Smith

Debbie and Laine are best friends. After Laine leaves Debbie's house one night, Debbie is found hanging by her neck with Christmas lights, dead. Laine house sits for Debbie's parents after the funeral. Laine gathers her friends at Debbie's house to play with Debbie's Ouija board. Her friends were not aware that Debbie has been playing with the Ouija for a long time. Her friends start to think that they have made contact with Debbie. They were not know that they were talking to the spirit that Debbie let lose in her house. They have to appease the spirits before they all die.

Here is another movie that is nothing but trying to make money off of a trend. It came from the makers and creators of other remakes. The scheme always works though. When one movie comes out in a certain genre, then for the next several years there are a flood of other movies released in the same genre. Some of these movies a big hits, and some just end up on a store shelf. Most of these know offs are thought of some of the best movie for the time, but that is where the problems start with these movie. There is not a long shelf life. I watch these movies and the plots are all so similar, and the actions in the movies are taken from other movies. An original idea is hard to find in the world of horror movies.
This movie was PG-13. Really? There is nothing scary at all about a made for tweens horror movie. Let's watch this family friendly horror movie. I said no thank you. Are you serious? If I do not see tons of blood and a couple of pairs of ta tas, then it is a bad horror movie. There are very few exceptions to that rule. I can hear you saying it now. This was one of those movies where you can guess most of what is going to happen throughout the entire film. There are too many of those out there.

If you must watch this movie, then do it. Just do not except a good solid horror. If you are then you will disappointed. There is hardly any blood or real scary scene. Enjoy it if you must.

Ouija (2014) Trailer

Battleship (2012)

Director: Peter Berg

Stars: Alexander Skarsgård, Brooklyn Decker, Liam Neeson, Taylor Kitsch, Rihanna

After a Naval graduation on a ship, a group of space ships land in the water on Earth, and the Navy has placed battleships to defend America.

That is what this movie is about. There is no story line. The movie is based on a freaking board game. That has only been done once successfully with the movie Clue, and that was because that movie has a great comedic cast. I'm still waiting for Hungry, Hungry Hippos the Movie. Where the hell is that. It would at least be amusing to see hippos running around eating everything.

This movie had a popular trendy cast. I mean come on Rihanna in a really bad wig. They could have save money and hired a nobody to play the part. This creators of this movie seemed like they just threw a bunch of names at the script to see which one would stick and needed the money. Liam Neeson is the only one that can really act in the movie. The rest of the cast are good to bad. This was a waste of money, but the movie was made for the masses and nothing more. They shoved over $200 million into this movie. They could have built homes for the homeless with all of that money instead of this piece of crap.

The only good thing I can say about the movie, is that the special effects were great. Those scenes were really cool to watch, but that was most of the movie. Nothing else really good to say. If you have not seen this movie yet, then I do not know why on Earth you would do so. Skip the hell out of it. 

Battleship (2012) Trailer

Premonition (2007)

Director: Mennan Yapo

Stars: Sandra Bullock, Julian McMahon, Amber Valletta

Linda Hanson and Jim Hanson are a normal middle-class couples raising their two daughters. One day the local sheriff comes to their house to inform Linda that her husband has been killed in a car accident. The next morning he is alive and in bed. These mix ups keep going back and forth convincing her that her husband is still alive. Linda's family believes that under the stress her is losing her mind. She is having a problem getting her days in order, but she still believes that her husband is alive.

The cast was great with good performances. Sandra Bullock nails her role like always. The rest of the cast blended into the background of the movie. It was not in a bad way at all. They played their part well, but let the main story line shine through with adding too much unnecessary information. The story line was solid, when you get to the ending. The story can be a bit confusing, if you do not pay attention to it. Just keep up and focus, and you will see the entire story.

I am not going to say too much about this movie. I do not want to spoil it for anyone who has yet to watch it. I did not watch it until it had been out a few years. It is a watchable movie, but that is about all. The movie keeps you interested enough for one viewing. Enjoy.

Premonition (2007) Trailer

Leprechaun (1993)

Director: Mark Jones

Stars: Warwick Davis, Jennifer Aniston, Ken Olandt, Mark Holton, Robert Hy Gorman

Dan O'Grady comes home to his wife, after stealing gold from a leprechaun. That night the leprechaun comes to his house to collect his gold and punish the O'Grady's. Dan traps the leprechaun in a crate with a four leaf clover on top. Ten years later, J.D. Reding buys the old O'Grady house, and he moves with his daughter Tory from L.A. to The Mid-West. J.D. hires a local group of guys to paint the house. While cleaning up the basement, the leprechaun was set free from the crate. They all have to kill the leprechaun or turn over all of the gold.

This movie was Jennifer Aniston first movie. Everyone has to get a start somewhere. Her character was pretty annoying. It was a period of time in movie where anyone that was from Southern California was the most uptight, pampered spoiled soul that existed. That whole added character flaw was just too over the top. Ozzie was a "special" or slow adult that was really child-like that swallowed a gold piece because he's just too special. Oh, no.

They just tried to make this movie too funny. It was so far away from funny that the humor was scary. The entire movie took place in one day. She just meet these people, and she is caring for them in hopes to go out with the f*ckable one. Sadness. The make-up for the leprechaun was great as was the acting, but the one liners were killed with Elm St. series. The whole shoe polishing part was a bit too much, and it really did not make much sense to me. He would wipe the shoes then throw them in 
the dirt. It would have been better to just leave that scene out.

Lame movie with lame deaths. This is the first of many Leprechaun movies, so many more to cover. It was not fun. Watch for the fun of it, but it is not a great movie by any means. Enjoy.

Leprechaun (1993) Trailer

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

The Book of Life (2014)

Director: Jorge R. Gutiérrez

Stars: Diego Luna, Zoe Saldana, Channing Tatum, Ron Perlman, Christina Applegate, Ice Cube, Hector Elizondo, Danny Trejo

A small group of children go to the museum to learn about the meaning of the Mexican celebration of The Day of the Dead. The tour guide tells the children of the story of three friends Manolo, Maria and Joaquin. Manolo and Joaquin are both in love with Maria. Xibalba and La Muerte both run a part of the underworld. They place a bet to switch places on which one of the boys will marry Maria. Maris is sent off to school, while the boys grow up. When Maria comes back both of the boys do what they have to do to win her heart and hand in marriage.

I know I made this movie sound really simple. There is nothing simple about this movie at all. The story is very interesting. How many kids movie tell stories about the history of Mexican customs? Exactly. The movie was entertaining for all ages. The movie does not speak over kids heads, not does it talk down to them. The colors of the movie are beyond bright and beautiful. I could not believe how great the movie looked. The animation was breathtaking. The details of each of the characters and the background of each of the scenes was perfect and rich. There is so much going on in the scenes and the entire movie that it never gets boring to the eye or mind. I was just shocked by how good this movie was.

My only complaint about the movie was this was a period movie, but the music was modern day. I really hate when they do that. I know it makes the movie more active to kids hearing the same lyrics in this movie as they hear on the radio. I am just never have been a fan of that. They could have just left the singing out of it, and just had music in the background. I think would have been really nice. A Spanish guitar playing softly in the background.

Like I said, this was a really well made and entertaining animated movie. It is a movie that you could 
rewatch over and over, I think. There is just so much to look at in the movie. It is one to own, just to watch all of the extras. Enjoy.

The Book of Life (2014) Trailer

Monday, February 9, 2015

Big Eden (2000)

Director: Thomas Bezucha
Stars: Arye Gross, Eric Schweig, Tim DeKay, Louise Fletcher, George Coe, Nan Martin, Corinne Bohrer

Henry Hart is an artist living in New York City. He has a show about to open, until he receives a phone call from back home in Montana. His grandfather that raised him has had a stroke. Henry is flying back home to take care of him. At the same time Henry's high school crush/best friend, Dean Stewart is divorce and has moved back to town. Pike, Native American that owns and runs the general store, is interested in Henry as well. Even though Henry is spending a lot of time with Dean, the commitment is just not there for Dean. He wants to be with Henry, but he cannot do it. The other people in town see something between Henry and Pike, so they try to bring these two men closer together.

This is not even closer to what a typical gay movie consist of. There is no one getting AIDS or dying from it. No one is dealing with a family or friends that are not excepting of a lifestyle. There was not one sex scene or late night in the backroom of a bar getting laid, or people having sex at all. There are no barely dressed skinny twinks doing drugs and everyone that comes along. This is the most family gay movie that I have ever seen. The movie is about a small community bring two men together. That is something that is so unheard of in a movie. Older people working on getting two men together.
The cast was all an older one except for a few kids that were in it. The movie was made up of quality character actors that you know their faces but not their names. Arye Gross is a talented underrated actor whom has been in tons of movies and TV. This was one of his best roles. Eric Schweig was a person that you would never think to see playing a gay character, since he mainly portrays a Native American. He is Native American, so it really fits him. He is a handsome man with the most beautiful hair I have ever seen on a man. Tim DeKay had the most emotional scenes in the entire movie. When he became upset, you could really feel his pain. His acting was so much better than I thought it would be. He has butterface with an amazing body.

The real star of the movie for me was Nan Martin. Who does not just love that old bitty? She was absolutely brilliant in this movie. Her lines and actions were the top in the movie. Those scenes were the best. The other star of the movie was the fantastic Louise Fletcher. Most of the time she plays a total mean bitch. Those are the type of roles that she is famous for. The head nurse in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest where she is a hard nose by the book nurse. The mean crazy mother in Flowers In the Attic that treated her grandchildren terrible and lock them in the attic. She had some mean roles, but not in this movie at all. She was the best friend and motherly figure that some people dream about. That person in your life that no matter what she is there to listen to you and love you. Louise Fletcher is a great actress.

The music in the movie was a great collection of newer and classic country, not the type of music you would expect to hear in a gay movie. This is the list of country artists that are featured in the movie: George Jones, Dwight Yoakam, Buck Owens, Jim Reeves, Skeeter Davis, Lucinda Williams, David Allan Coe and Lari White. These are not the typical music for a gay movie. There was no bass, bump and grind or divas singing. All of that was left out of this movie. The songs selected set the mood and theme for the movie. It was amazing song selection.

A great movie for any audience to watch. I know everyone that I know that has seen it has loved the movie. It is a movie to add to your collection. Enjoy.
Big Eden (2000) Trailer

Camp (2003)

Director: Todd Graff

Stars: Don Dixon, Daniel Letterle, Joanna Chilcoat, Robin de Jesus, Sasha Allen, Anna Kendrick, Stephen Sondheim

A musical theater summer camp in New York is getting a guest music director Bert Handley, whom has been binge drinking after writing a series of flops. These kids that come to this camp every year see this place as home where they fit in. They are mostly poked at and made fun of in their normal lives. A new guy comes to camp, Vlad, a straight guy. All of the young gay boys want him and so do the girls. All of the kids get together to work with the music that Bert Handley brought with him to camp.

This movie has several different smaller stories through the movie. Each one of the kids has a story and a back story to tell. The smaller stories in the movie really carries the story. This is not a great movie, but it is a really good movie. The acting was god and solid from each person. The sets could have been better, but this movie was filmed at a real musical theater camp in upstate New York that the creators attend as a youth. You really do get the realness of the movie from the camp.
The music performed in the movie was taken from older musicals, mostly from the 70's. I am not a fan of musicals, but this movie turned me on to the music in this movie. It was the cast doing just a great job of singing these songs. I sing along when I watch the movie.

Anna Kendrick's role really sticks out for me in this movie. She was the real break out star of this movie. The rest of the cast did not work that much after this movie, but any way. Anna's performance was bitchy and deadpan. I loved it. Daniel Letterle's performance was kind of weak in places, but he is so good to look at that it does not really matter. The rest of the cast was great. I wish they would have gotten more work. Some of those kids had great singing voices.

I really do like this movie a lot. I love the music that was picked, and the cast did a great job of performing it. I think this is a movie to add to your collection. It is slow at times, but a lot of movie do that. Enjoy.

Camp (2003) Trailer
Camp (2003) Full Movie

X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

Director: Brett Ratner

Stars: Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, Halle Berry, Ian McKellen, Famke Janssen, Anna Paquin, Kelsey Grammer, James Marsden, Rebecca Romijn, Shawn Ashmore, Aaron Stanford, Vinnie Jones, Ellen Page, Daniel Cudmore, Ben Foster, Michael Murphy, Eric Dane, Cameron Bright

Jean Gray is gone, and Cyclops is still mourning her death. While he is spending time where she died, he starts to hear her call his name. The Phoenix has been born. Jean is taken back to the mansion to be checked out by Xavier. There is an announcement made that the government has found a cure for the mutant gene through a mutant that can cure a person just by getting near them. Magneto has called together the brotherhood and is searching for an army to stop the government and military from curing mutants. The X-Men must stop the Brotherhood and Phoenix from destroying everything.

They are problems with this movie, and we will get to them. The movie was really good. There was a story, good action and acted well. The problems were the story. Did they really have to kill so many people off? For the people that have not seen this movie yet, I will not spoil anything. You just probably need to clean under that rock you hiding under.

There was a new director and writers for this one. That was the biggest mistake for the series. They ruined the series with this one. You have a comic book series of multiple characters that you could turn into to endless movie, which they are doing now. The X-Men movies were great and there were so many more stories that could have been made into movie, but they killed too many characters in this one. Why in the hell would you kill off main characters? Do you not want to made more X-Men movies? They were so stupid, but it was a good movie any way.

The characters increased in this one. I think that they tried to throw way too much into this movie with some of the characters only getting a very small amount of scene time. Here is the list of mutants in this movie: Professor Charles Xavier, Wolverine, Magneto, Storm, Jean Grey, Cyclops, Rogue, Mystique, Nightcrawler, Pyro, Iceman, Shadowcat, Jubilee, Artie, Siryn, Beast, Juggernaut, Angel, Multiple Man, Leech, Lizard Man, Psylocke, Arclight, Colossus and Phoenix. That is a lot of people in a movie. I think it is a bit too much.

The interesting subject of the movie was the curing of being a mutant. The subject parallels people looking for a cure for being gay. Both sides agree with that is a genetic difference, and a person cannot be cure because there is nothing wrong with them. If you really think about it, then the two ideas do come together.

The movie is good, but it killed the series. They could have done so much more with it, but we did get to see Phoenix for the first time. Get it and watch it again. Enjoy.

X-Men: The Last Stand (2006) Trailer

X2 (2003)

Director: Bryan Singer

Stars: Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, Halle Berry, Ian McKellen, Famke Janssen, James Marsden, Anna Paquin, Rebecca Romijn, Brian Cox, Alan Cumming, Bruce Davison, Aaron Stanford, Shawn Ashmore, Katie Stuart, Kea Wong, Daniel Cudmore

Magneto is imprisoned in an all plastic prison. An unknown mutant makes attacks the President of the United States, so some the X-Men men head out to find him. Logan is in search for his past. A scientist named William Stryker discovers the school for gifted children, and he is the key to Logan's past. There is an attack by the military at Xavier's school to kidnap the students and uncover the secrets hidden in the mansion. The students have to step up to help the other students escape and help Logan fight the military invasion.

Now, normally a sequel sucks, but this one was better than the first by a long shot. The story was better, the characters worked better together and the look of the movie was so much better. This movie had all of the needed elements to make a good sci-fi really come together to entertain.
This sequel had to completely out do and surpass the first one, and it did with addition to the added characters becoming some of the main characters. Here is the list of characters: Professor Charles Xavier, Wolverine, Magneto, Storm, Jean Grey, Cyclops, Rogue, Mystique, Nightcrawler, Pyro, Iceman, Lady Deathstrike, Shadowcat, Jubilee, Artie, Siryn, and Colossus. That is quite a list of characters, but a lot of them have very small parts in the movie. It was nice to see them to bring some of the students to help fight, and just not running away with all of the other students underground.
The story for the sequel was a lot deeper than the first. You could tell that they were working on a long storyline that would involve several other spin off movies. The story was more intense and multi-layered. Wolverine had a storyline involving how he got metal inside of him. The character of William Stryker was placed in the front of the story, and what he was doing to mutants through research and government.

The cast was well played. I'm not a big fan of Alan Cumming, but I thought he was great as Nightcrawler. The make-up work look real and his speaking accent was spot on for what you would think he would sound like. There was no disappointment there at all. Casting for Storm will always bother me, but let's move on. This being the sequel and we are seeing some of the same characters coming back with new ones joining, the cast is now starting to become believable. You are starting to picture these actors when you hear the characters name, which is great for the series.

I loved this movie. If you love the movie and do not own it, then go out and get you a copy, by all means. What are you waiting for. They look great on blur ray. Enjoy.

X2 (2003) Trailer

Saturday, February 7, 2015

X-Men (2000)

Director: Bryan Singer
Stars: Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, Ian McKellen, Famke Janssen, James Marsden, Halle Berry, Anna Paquin, Tyler Mane, Ray Park, Rebecca Romijn, Bruce Davison

Marie a.k.a. Rogue was making out with her boyfriend, when she started to suck the life out of him. She runs away from home to meet Logan a.k.a. Wolverine. Leaving together they runs into other mutants that are looking for Rogue. After the Logan being knocked out, they end up in a mansion, a school for gifted children. Professor Charles Xavier runs the school to help mutants and leader of the X-Men. Senator Kelly is on board to cure the mutants of their uniqueness. Eric Lensherr a.k.a. Magneto wants to start a war with humans to be superior over all mankind. The X-Men have to stop Magneto and his crew from killing everyone.

When this movie was announced the entire comic world applauded and tensed up at the same time. People could not believe that it was going to happen, and they were scared that Hollywood would completely screw it up. For the time period and advances in movie special effects, the time was finally here to make the X-Men movie the way it should be done. These are mutants with crazy powers , and several of them do not look like regular humans. They pulled off the make-up to create the look for Mystique. She looked amazing, and her acting was spot on.
The cast was great for the most part. Hugh Jackman became the hottest sexiest ticket in town. It was the shirtless muscled up furry chest that sent people overboard. He really made the movie with those few shirtless scenes. Everyone else was great in their role. I will always say this. I know I need to get over it, but what in the hell did they do to Storm? I know movie are more interested in name than anything else. Halle Berry was a terrible pick for the part. Iman would have been the best choice for Storm. I mean just look at that woman. She is tall, thin and has the accent. Just image Iman in a big long white wig. Now you get it.

The story for the movie was a big meet and great for the X-Men and the Brotherhood. You got to see how they created the few characters that were included in the first movie. The movie was a battle between good and evil, when you really think about it. Humans want the mutants to be identified with some sort of mark, like the Jews were.

The movie is great. I just hope some dumbass wants to revamp the movie. You know it will happen someday. This movie started the Marvel movie craze. I am glad it happen. We owe it all to this movie. It is a movie to own. Enjoy.

X-Men (2000) Trailer